Infinite Gratitude is not only an expectation, but a subtle and firm reminder to immigrants of their submission and marginalization. The demand to profusely and enthusiastically be grateful and express limitless obeisance even when confronted with discrimination and bias can make for a cognitively dissonating immigrant experience.
The demand to express infinite gratitude takes place on two levels; the macro/public level and the micro/private level. Infinite gratitude is much easier to spot on a macro level since it is an open, direct, and grotesque example of power and privilege. One example that comes to mind is the separation of migrant children from their parents at the southern border. Calls to express limitless gratitude by immigrants at the cost of the wellbeing of these children and their parents was expected, even demanded. When images of migrant children in cages, crowded, in unsanitary conditions were released, these pictures were quickly explained away, by some likening the experiences of these children to summer camp. The rationale being that immigrant children living in cages were somehow living a better life than what they faced in their own countries. The demand to express gratitude infinitely is weaponized and used against immigrant bodies cementing their marginalized status within society. Moreover, the constant need to replenish the well of gratitude at the cost of pain and tears is disuniting for immigrants.
Although, the recognition for infinite gratitude is easy to spot, critique, and distance ourselves from on a macro/public level, expressions for infinite gratitude can be easily missed and sometimes ignored in private/micro spaces. In the workplace, subtle reminders to immigrant workers to be infinitely grateful are often hidden under the guise of advice, support, helping, sometimes even mentoring. The demand for immigrants to be infinitely grateful surface when requests for pay raises or promotions are made. Such requests accompanied with subtle reminders about sponsorship, visas, green cards, and filing fees are strategically brought up as a way to foreclose these appeals. Most immigrant workers are cognizant to the fact that they are held to different standards in the workplace. The open confessions of deliberately creating hurdles in order to showcase the success, ability, and the strength of the immigrant worker is illustrative of the discrimination and the different standards against which immigrants in the workplace are measured. In some cases, employers will tell immigrant workers that holding them to different standards is pertinent, beneficial, and “for their own good,” and as a result, they must produce boundless amounts of gratitude for this deeply problematic and discriminating experience. Thus, unlike the micro-aggressions that are often experienced by folks of color in the workplace, assertions such as these are aggressive demands reminding immigrant workers to be grateful no matter the circumstance or the cost to one’s wellbeing. In cases where immigrant workers retaliate or express their dissatisfaction, the tag of ungrateful immigrant worker is immediately slapped onto their bodies along with the risk of losing their job. As a result, keeping their heads down and expressing gratitude becomes a way for immigrant workers to survive in the workplace. This further adds to the conflicted ways in which immigrant communities come to experience their worlds and make sense of their experiences in the workplace and beyond.
A distinction must be drawn between gratitude and infinite gratitude. In that while, gratitude is unconditional, free, and open, the demand to be infinitely grateful even at the cost of one’s humanity and dignity is deeply problematic. Although, immigrant persons will quite often and openly express their unconditional appreciation, the not-so-subtle demands to express gratitude infinitely no matter the circumstance creates for a frictional, dissonating, and a discriminating immigrant experience.
While, this blog focuses on immigrants and their experiences living in the United States, the demand to be infinitely grateful regardless of circumstances are experiences that intersect with other marginalized communities. Thus, by naming the ways in which marginalized communities are expected, demanded, even reprimanded into expressing infinite gratitude no matter the circumstance in the work place and beyond, allows us to see the ways in which intersectionality can create for stronger ties of solidarities across lines.
